分节阅读_103

  ”very different,” i agreed. ”more for i'd imagined.”
  ”for example” — his iftly now, i had to trate to
  catch it all — ”the emotion of jealousy. i've read about it a hundred
  thousand times, seen actors portray it in a thousa plays and
  movies. i believed i uhat oy clearly. but it shocked
  me…” he grimaember the day that mike asked you to the
  dance?”
  i hough i remembered that day for a differehe day
  you started talking to me again.”
  ”i rised by the flare of rese, almost fury, that i felt — i
  didn't reize what it was at first. i was eveed than
  usual that i 't knoere thinking, why you refused him.
  ly for your friend's sake? was there someone else? i knew i
  had nht to care either way. i tried not to care.
  ”ahe lied f,” he chuckled. i s the
  darkness.
  ”i waited, unreasonably anxious to hear what you would say to them, to
  watch your expressions. i 't deny the relief i felt, watg the
  annoyan your face. but i 't be sure.
  ”that was the first night i came here. i wrestled all night, while
  watg you sleep, with the chasm between what i knew was right, moral,
  ethid what i wanted. i k if i ued to ignore you as i
  should, or if i left for a few years, till yo someday
  you would say yes to mike, or someo made me angry.
  ”and then,” he whispered, ”as you were sleeping, you said my name. you
  spoke so clearly, at first i thought you'd woken. but you rolled over
  restlessly and mumbled my name once more, ahe feeling that
  ch me theaggering. and i knew i 't
  ignore you any longer.” he was silent for a moment, probably listening to
  the suddenly uneven pounding of my heart.
  ”but jealousy… it's a strahing. so much more powerful than i would
  have thought. and irrational! just now, when charlie asked you about that
  vile mike on…” he shook his head angrily.
  ”i should have known you'd be listening,” i groaned.
  ”of course.”
  ”that made you feel jealous, though, really?”
  ”i'm his; you're resurreg the human in me, ahing
  feels stro's fresh.”
  ”but holy,” i teased, ”for that to bother you, after i have to hear
  that rosalie — rosalie, the in of pure beauty, rosalie — was
  meant for you. emmett or , hoete with that?”
  ”there's ioh gleamed. he dreed hands
  around his bae to his chest. i kept as still as i could,
  evehing with .
  ”i know there's ion,” i mumbled into his . ”that's
  the problem.”
  ”of course rosalie is beautiful in her way, but even if she wasn't like a
  sister to me, eve didh her, she ever have
  oh, h of the attra you hold for me.” he was
  serious now, thoughtful. ”for almost y years i've walked among my
  kind, and yours… all the time thinking i lete i
  realizing what i was seeking. and not finding anything, because you
  weren't alive yet.”
  ”it hardly seems fair,” i whispered, my face still resting o,
  listening to his breath e and go. ”i haven't had to wait at all. why
  should i get off so easily?”
  ”yht,” he agreed with amusement. ”i should make this harder for
  you, definitely.” he freed one of his hands, released my wrist, only to
  gather it carefully into his other haroked my wet hair softly,
  from the top of my head to my waist. ”you oo risk your life
  every sed you spe's surely not muly have to
  turn your baature, on humanity… what's that worth?”
  ”very little — i don't feel deprived of anything.”
  ”.” and his voice tly full of a grief.
  i tried to pull back, to look i his hand locked my wrist